Back by popular demand, one year later! Here’s the 2007 version of “Signs You Need a Break from SEO.” Enjoy!
1.) In the middle of Sunday morning church services, you decide that The Ten Commandments are the original linkbait.
3.) You setup a new blog for your 9-year-old, taught him what RSS is and how to use Bloglines, and told him to start reading the Problogger feed, because if Stephan Spencer’s kid can make money online, yours can, too, dammit.
4.) Even though you’re not a homeowner, even though you’re not a real estate agent, and even though you don’t care about real estate in any way, shape, or form, you read the Zillow blog … “because Vanessa Fox works there now.”
5.) Without even looking, you know how to spell Philipp Lenssen‘s name correctly. (That’s one L, two Ps, two Ss.)
6.) You’re filling out a registration form for your child, and when it asks for Emergency Contact, you put Matt Cutts. For Relationship, you put “I commented on his blog once.”
7.) Your spouse makes you erase that, so instead you put Danny Sullivan and “Father (of SEO).”
8.) As you arrive at your vacation destination — a gorgeous, beachside hotel in Honolulu — a pretty, young lady greets you. This is heaven, you think to yourself. She puts a lai around your neck and says “Mahalo!” You punch her.
9.) You’re out with friends and one of them tells a fantastic story. At the end, you start to twitch because you can’t find a “Sphinn This” button anywhere.
10.) Your spouse leaves you a note with five chores you have to get done over the weekend. You ignore it because you’re tired of numbered lists.
11.) When your spouse gets angry three weeks later because the chores aren’t done, you tell her the note is stuck in your supplemental index. And you take away her ability to see what other notes are in there.
12.) You’ve not only thought about, but you’ve also written about the business benefits of Twitter.
13.) You know more about the famous chef Dave Pasternack than you did at this time last year.
14.) You have a dream one night in which you’re on a beach, competing in a Survivor-like competition that has something to do with running as fast as you can and collecting flags from various “stations”, only you’re not trying to win a million dollars and Jeff Probst is nowhere to be found. Instead, you’re competing against Stuntdubl and Jeff Probst’s role is being handled by Danny Sullivan. (I’m not making that up. I had that dream.)
15.) As a music fan, you’d really like to get into Linkin Park, but you don’t because it sounds like a bad neighborhood.
16.) The nurse tells you and your spouse that you’re going to have twins. You secretly hope they’re not identical. You know … duplicate content issues.
18.) You’ve quit your fantasy football league and started a new fantasy game based on points being earned on YOUmoz.
19.) The candidates’ use of social media, SEO, and PPC will have even the slightest impact on your 2008 presidential vote.
20.) Your friend, the longtime Apple geek, is reminiscing one night about how much he loved the Lisa, and you think to yourself … Barone?
21.) You laughed at anything on this list!
Related: Top 21 Signs You Need a Break from SEO (2006 edition)